I'm cunting lonely again and the only reasonable thing I can think to do is to drink this beer that tastes like cigarettes, hey two birds with one stone. See I can be optimistic!

Did you know that when you go to a psychologists office as a first time patient that they make you fill out a questionnaire about how much you want to die? Questions like "Do you have thoughts of suicide?" Your choices are consisted of 4 fabulous answers:

1.Never
2.Sometimes
3.Frequently
4.Almost always

So I of course answer 'sometimes', because I'm just too modest for my own good. Then the next question is, 'Do you ever have homicidal urges?'

Haha my fucking life has now been complete. Wouldn't it be something if I pulled out a knife and stabbed the miserable bastard sitting next to me clutching his clipboard trying to answer question number 10, "Do you have thoughts/feelings of paranoia?"

If you know what I am even talking about you'd be laughing a lot more than anyone has the right to, if you are furrowing your eyebrows and leafing through yet another self help book, kill yourself now, trust me on this.

Anyway, so these questionnaires are starting to become extinct and replaced by a palm pilot device. I know this because I go through psychologists like hooker goes through abortions and STD meds. Oh Snap! I'm in the know about this shit and the word on the street is don't trust a shrink if he isn't eco-friendly.

Well that ends my psychobabble for the night. Y'all come back now ya hear!?!

Oh be sure to share your doctors office experiences as well. That's right bitches, share with the group. Hugs and coffee afterward.